Chance or Choice
by PlaceboLove
Summary: HIATUS AU: No magic. Draco and Harry split up and Harry ran. Now he is back and living in a small London neighborhood, with Seamus and selling his paintings at a local cafe. HPDM SLASH. With mentions of HGRW.
1. The usual then?

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Harry Potter... as much as I would love too.

**Summary**: Draco and Harry split up and Harry ran. Now he is back and living in a muggle neighborhood, with Seamus and selling his paintings at a local cafe. HPDM SLASH. With mentions of HGRW.

* * *

Cold spring rain pounded down, soaking the inhabitants of Pennington Street. A thin man in his mid twenties stepped out of his flat, slamming a green door shut behind him. He quickly set off down the narrow street, hugging a black jumper closer to his petite frame and head bent against the wind. A dark green shoulder bag hung loosely at his side, occasionally bumping into him as he walked.

He quickened his pace and then turned left when he hit Essex Road. The street was brimming with midday shoppers and people looking for a suitable eatery. One of his slender hands automatically went down to pull his bag closer to his body so as not to let it bump into anyone, while he fought the onslaught of pedestrians. He cut sideways through the crowd and carefully opened the door to the Blue Moon. The cafe was warm and well lit. The peach walls giving it a cozy feel. The smell of fresh ground coffee hung in the air and the sound of some new band played under the chatter of customers. It was big enough, with a few couches along the walls and tables in the middle. Pillars were placed randomly throughout the room and were adorned by paintings and sketches.

The man closed the door behind blocking out the wind and the rain. He shivered slightly and shook his head like a dog, smiling slighting as dark wavy locks flew in front of his eyes spraying water everywhere.

"Oi! Jamie! Want a towel mate? Or could you stop spraying my customers?" The man behind the counter called, his voice kind and filled with friendly amusement. He looked about thirty, with short curly brown hair and a defined face. He wore tan trousers from which a dishtowel hung and a yellow t-shirt with a lion on it. His face was creased with smile lines and his teeth looked nice.

"Opps. Sorry David! It's raining!" He said laughing, his face bright with childlike excitement. His hand reaching up to remove his glasses and rub them dry on the shirt under his jumper.

"No really? I never would have guessed. But thank you for bringing it in here." David said turning around to add some cream to drink he was making, swirling it slightly. "Oh! I almost forgot! Taylor called this morning. Says your painting should be done by Monday. He also said that he wants to show some of them in the festival next week!"

The man looked pleased by this news, but didn't reply. He stepped farther into the cafe and took his bag of his shoulder. He was glad it wasn't to busy today, there was usually a lull on Wednesday afternoons. He walked casually to the dark blue couch in corner, politely nodding to the regulars he knew and smiling to those he didn't. He dropped his bag on the couch marking it as his and then went back to the counter.

"So the usual then?" David asked smiling. Without waiting for a reply he grabbed a big red cup and started filling it up. David knew him so well, it didn't hurt that he had been ordering the same low fat mocha in the red cup since he had started coming there two years prior. In those two years a playful sarcastic friendship had bloomed, and he now regarded David as a brother.

"Of course. Although I may have to start ordering something else just to switch it up on you." He said handing David a fiver. "Oh David, what would I do without you and your wonderful mochas."

"Honestly I have no idea... You might die! Nah.. probably find some other coffeehouse to haunt and some other hardworking soul to torment." David ended dramatically with a sigh and hand over his brow.

"Hah! Right.. Hardworking! I'll give you a tip for the performance though. Nice reference to death and spirits." He said cheekily, tossing a few a few quid into David's tip jar. It featured a picture of David sleeping on a couch, the glare of the tele on his face and empty bottle of Guinness sat on the coffee table. Somebody had written on the corner in messy lettering: College?

"It's what pays the bills." David said smiling and spreading Jam onto a piece of toast and putting on plate, he quickly gave it to a man in brown trousers and a black pullover. "Yours will be done in a sec Jamie."

"Okay thanks!" He said eyeing the red cup eagerly. "So how is Mairea? She coming in today?"

"Yeah maybe later. She has to finish up a bit of work at home though. She has the day off." David said adding a bit of whip cream to the mocha. He liked Mairea, she had wavy brown hair that she kept tied in a bun and wore interesting clothes. She was sweet, funny and very intelligent. However she worked as a solicitor and was usually tired when he saw her. She was also a vegan and had slowly turned David into one as well.

"Here's you coffee. My break is in about ten minutes. Don't be a stranger." David said handing over the now hot red cup.

"Yeah okay. Oh man you're getting a queue! I'll see you later." He said balancing the cup and sidestepping a young woman carrying a sticky looking toddler.

He slowly walked back to his couch and took a long sip up his mocha before setting his cup on the table in front of him. It was small and square with rainbow splotches of paint covering its surface. He liked the little table. He had painted it the previous summer when he had gotten tired of David complaining that its peeling white paint was ugly.

After getting his cup situated he plopped himself down casually and into a sitting position, his legs spread out in front of him and his back to the counter. He picked up his cup and took another large gulp, savoring the way the delicious liquid warmed his throat. He replaced the cup on the table and unzipped his bag and pulled out a sketch book. It was adorned with drops of paint, black and white photos and news paper clippings. He dug deeper into his bag and retrieved a pack of fags and some matches. He took one of each and carefully struck that match.

"You know those will kill you, right?" whispered a smooth voice next to his ear. His heart stopped suddenly and his eyes closed shut. He suddenly felt incredibly exposed and panicky. He had been avoiding that voice for three years and it had finally found him in a small, not to mention muggle, coffee shop in Islington. He slowly lifted his head to look into striking silver eyes.

"Hello Draco." He said curtly, snapping his neck back to focus on his dwindling match. He quickly brought it to the end of his cigarette and inhaled. "Thanks for that. I'd forgotten."

"Well glad I could help. Do you mind if I sit down?" Draco asked after moving forwards towards the couch, putting him in direct view of the man sitting on the couch. Draco looked good. His hair was longer and styled with the current trend. His jeans were obviously expensive and fit nicely without being too tight or too loose. He wore a white shirt with a flashy silver dragon under a dark fitted blazer. He looked cool.

"Yes, in fact I do. There is a large selection of other tables in this establishment and I'm quite certain you could sit at one of those." The brunette said icily, stretching out his legs further.

Draco pretended not to have heard him and kept walking. He quickly grabbed a near by chair and placed it down behind the coffee table.

"So are you always this much of an ice queen? Or am I just special?" Draco asked taking a seat gracefully in his new chair and staring at the now irate man across from him.

"You're just special." He said through pursed lips and glaring at Draco. He took a long drag from his fag and deliberately blew the smoke at the blonde. Draco didn't even blink, he just wrinkled his nose in distaste.

"Hey mate. Here is your vanilla mocha, without whip cream but with a small shot of Irish rum." David said coming over and placing a small purple cup in front of Draco and beaming. "Finally bringing

"Er, no Dave. He's just an old acquaintance from school.. that just happened to be here at the same time." He said his face bright and voice suddenly cheery with the appearance of David.

"Oh I see, yeah… okay! Well just wave if you need anything." David said giving Draco an odd look before returning to his post from behind the counter.

"First, who the hell is that? You shagging the barista? And second, Jamie? What the fuck?" Draco asked looking caught in between bewilderment and anger.

"First, not that it is any of you business, but David and I are just friends. He also happens to be straight as a ruler!" The brunette said through a forced calm whisper. He dropped his gaze to his sketchbook and was flipping through his sketchbook violently. He was clearly becoming extremely irritated.

"And the name? Jamie? Why Jamie?" Draco countered, his voice raising trying to get the man's attention.

"Well!" He began angrily and then paused. "It started out as James, you know my middle name, then people just shortened it. I'm not completely sure… just a sort of new life new identity thing. I needed a change. Only my friends call me Harry." He said becoming absorbed in finding a blank page again. "What are you here Draco?"

" To escape the rain and buy a warm beverage.." Draco trailed off looking innocent and amused.

"I'm serious. How the hell did you find me? And I don't believe your little story. Why this café? Why today? What do you want! I have nothing to say to you and I doubt that there is anything you can say that will interest me!" He finished looking exasperated.

"Well.. I mean.. I missed you, okay! I've missed talking to you and doing things with you. Just messing about and all that… Anyway why does me turning up have to be such a bad thing, Harry?" Draco said drawing out the last word and causing Harry to flinch at the sound of his name. It had been so long since he had heard it from that mouth. He didn't feel like that man anymore. He didn't feel as exuberant or full of life or… or happy. Sure it appeared as if he was happy on the outside but that was a façade. Anger suddenly bubbled beneath the surface.

"I don't care Draco! I don't care that you miss me or you missed talking to me! I don't bloody care!" He said in his forced whisper again. "And you made it a bad thing! Now please just leave. Please."

Draco's face lost the cocky smirk it always held, but it was reanimated in a matter of seconds that Harry wondered if it had even happened. Only his eyes held the impact of Harry's words. He looked tired and regretful. He sighed quietly and then quickly drained his cup. He stood up and gave Harry a final quick once over before walking to towards the door. He turned once he reached it and gave David a little wave of thanks and then disappeared into the ever-moving crowd outside.

Harry watched after him, a sinking feeling in his heart. He had imagined seeing Draco again in his mind so many times, but he had never thought he would so heart broken or so guilty. Draco wasn't supposed to be weak like that. He was supposed to take it in stride when Harry yelled at him. He sighed looking back down at his sketchbook. He no longer had any desire to draw. He carefully stowed the book back in his bag. He picked up his fag and took another long drag before putting it out in the ashtray. He looked sadly at his half empty coffee, it was cold now.

"Hey Jamie my breaks just started." David said walking over and taking Draco's vacated chair. He deposited a new cup, but black cup on the table. "Figured with a face like that you could do with a new drink. This one's on me mate."

Harry sighed and took a big sip of the hot drink. He didn't find as much pleasure in it this time. He muttered a quiet thanks before becoming silent again.

"So who was that then? And I mean really. You wouldn't get a look like that from a random mate from school." David said studying Harry's melancholy face.

"Just and ex-boyfriend." Harry whispered taking another sip from his coffee.

"Just and ex-boyfriend." He repeated to himself.


	2. Fish and Flowers?

**Disclaimer**: Again I don't own Harry Potter...

**Summary**: Draco and Harry split up and Harry ran. Now he is back and living in a muggle neighborhood, with Seamus and selling his paintings at a local cafe. HPDM SLASH. With mentions of HGRW.

**A/N: **This is the second chapter, and it gives a bit more insight into Harry and Draco's past. This, you will notice, I have called a FLASHBACK. However it really isn't a Flash back, it is just a way for me to tell you what happened.. but I couldn't think of what to call it.. so I stuck with flash back. Anyways... read on.

* * *

The bell tinkled softly as Harry pushed the door open. He carefully stepped out into the faint sunlight, the smell of recent rain filling his nostrils. He walked farther out of the door, letting the door fall shut behind him, and was instantly caught up in the hustle and bustle of after work shoppers. He smiled softly at the passers by who were carrying umbrellas while looking anxious as they tried not to gouge anyone. He kept walking, glad that he wasn't caught in the traffic that was moving sluggishly along. He turned right when he got to Pennington Street.

Harry's eyes traveled along the houses as he walked. When he had first moved in he had thought it was funny that all the houses looked the same, like it was something off of a postcard, now he didn't think it was funny. They all had the same white paint, the same light brown roof, and paned windows. They were all so boring. He stopped three blocks later in front of flat 50b. It looked identical to 50a except for the color of their doors. He sighed and walked slowly up their front walk, stopping to slide his key into the lock. He pushed hard on the door and winced slightly when it squeaked. He would have to oil it soon or it would start sticking again. He walked into his house and closed the door behind him, breathing deeply as he did. Fish... and flowers? Seamus must have a date.

"Oi! Seamus! I'm home! What's with the smell"" Harry yelled talking off his damp shoes and placing them by the hall tree and placing his keys on the side table. He automatically reached for the post, but it wasn't there. Seamus must have brought it up to the kitchen.

"It's our two month tonight! I'm cooking salmon and rice for Fredrik!" Seamus yelled back from the kitchen.

Harry smiled again as he climbed the stairs to the main level. He liked Fredrik. He was good looking in the blonde, blue eyed, Swedish sort of way. But more importantly he was so much nicer then the usual assholes Seamus dated, and he was sticking around. Harry hoped this one would work.

"Ah, I see. That would explain the over abundance of flowers. Tell me, did you happen to leave any at the shop?" Harry asked opening the fridge and taking out a soda.

"Ha-ha." Seamus said stirring a pot that appeared to hold some sort of vegetable. "So how was your day? Do anything productive?"

"Er.. well.. no. I went the Blue Moon; I brought my sketch book but then.. then I didn't feel like drawing. However Taylor says that the paintings should be done by Monday." Harry said taking a sip from his soda.

"Oh that's great! So he'll have them framed for you by the exposition? I know I've already told you, but they're really great Harry. They'll sell for big money." Seamus said looking up from the pot and smiling brightly.

Harry tried to smile back, but it felt forced. He found it funny that Seamus was more excited than he was. Money just wasn't very interesting to him. Though he doubted that was why he wasn't excited. He had been only a few hours ago, but now he felt rather numb. Somehow seeing Draco had sucked the enthusiasm out of him.

"Yeah it'll be brilliant. Really really great. But I'm a bit off color and my head is all wonky. I think I'll have a bath and then maybe watch a film before turning in." Harry called over his shoulder, already heading down the hall to his room. "Besides, don't want to be in the way when Freddie's here!

He heard Seamus giggle affectionately before he shut his door lightly. He stood just of the doorframe and surveyed his room. It was on the messy side but cozy. The room was long but narrow, with wood paneling covering the bottom half of the walls and light green pain on the top. In the far left corner, pressed up against the walls, was a large squashy bed with a lumpy quilt Hermione had made him. Close to his bed and under the only window sat his dresser. It was littered with loose change, CDs, cigarettes, matches and odd mementos. Against the wall opposite the bed was his desk and a small chair. Clothes covered a vast amount of the floor and shoes filled the bottom of his closet. The smell of freshly burnt incense still lingered in the air. He crossed the floor and tossed his bag gently onto the desk chair and then bent to scoop up some clothes and stuff them in his hamper.

"Hey Alexander." He said quietly to the sleeping orange tabby on his bed. Alexander had been last years Christmas present from Seamus. The cat lazily opened one eye to look at him and then closed it again.

Harry sighed, today felt so much longer then it really was. He took off his jacket and hung it across the back of his chair and then slowly walked to the door. He carefully turned the knob and stepped out into the hallway. He slowly padded to bathroom, stopping at the linen closet to get at towel. Glad that Seamus had finally done some laundry.

--------------------------------------

Dim light filled the bathroom from two identical windows. Night was falling and the rain had started again. Harry turned on the light but it stung his eyes and he opted to leave it off. He walked to the bath and turned the hot water on full. He slowly began to get undressed, lifting his shirt over his head. He stopped and stared idly into the mirror at his reflection. He looked thin and pale. The circles under his eyes, ever visible, made him look sickly. He unzipped his trousers and let them fall to the floor before stepping out of them. He groaned softly, his body felt tired and his muscles taut. He sighed once more and dropped his boxers and carefully got into the tub.

Hot water engulfed him, stinging his cold feet and sending goose pimples up his thin arms. He sunk lower, letting his body run along the bottom of the tub. The warm water began to loosen his body and he felt his muscles relax and closed his eyes. Images from earlier that day started to flash through his mind. Draco's eyes, Draco's lips, Draco's smile, Draco's smell.. _Draco_. The very thought made his heart clench painfully. Why did he have to come back? It was so much easier to be over him when he wasn't here.

_/FLASHBACK/_

_Soft light filled the yellow kitchen of a small apartment. A few dishes lay on the counter and even more were in the sink. A song played lazily across the scene from an old radio. A young man around the age of twenty-one sat at a large round wooden table. A half eaten cookie sat on a plate beside him. His body was slumped and he held his face in his hands, platinum blonde hair falling across his slender fingers._

_"Draco I'm home! Draco.. where are you?" Harry called from the front room, walking towards the kitchen. "Oh there you are."_

_Draco didn't answer. He kept his face down, ignoring the cheerful boy in front of him._

_"Draco? Draco are you okay?" Harry asked in a chair across from the blonde._

_"Yeah. I mean no. I mean I don't know." Draco mumbled, the sound muffled by the pale hands in front of his face._

_"Draco please tell me what's wrong." Harry said scooting his chair around the table to be closer to Draco. "What is it?"_

_"Nothing. I'm just thinking Harry." Draco said quietly, bending his body and resting his elbows on his knees, his face still in his hands._

_"Okay. Thinking about what?" Harry asked becoming slightly worried. "Are you trying to break up with me?" He asked suddenly, trying to play the question off as s joke, but still wanting Draco's quick reassurance._

_Draco stayed quiet from a few moments before raising his head to look Harry in the eyes. "Well.. yeah." He muttered softly, averting his eyes again._

_"W-what! Why? Harry choked out, looking stricken. He felt like the floor had disappeared from beneath, he felt vulnerable. This couldn't be happening._

_"I don't know. It's just not.. not working." Draco said lowering his face to his hands again in depletion. This seemed to be hurting Draco too, but Harry didn't care. He just wanted to know what the hell was happening._

_"N-not working? What do you mean not working!" Harry asked, his voice wavering slightly. Draco couldn't be really doing this! This had to be a joke, a sadistic joke._

_"Harry. I'm sorry. Really I am. I just don't think I love you.. anymore.. like.. like that." Draco ended lamely. He had parted his fingers to speak clearly and Harry could see his eyes. They were the same grey eyes he loved, but now they were filled with sad resolution._

_Harry sat facing him for a few second but not really seeing. It wasn't sinking in properly. He was still waiting for him to suddenly shake and wake up with his face in his pillow and realize this had all been a horrible dream. But this wasn't a dream, and he knew that. If he was dreaming he wouldn't be able to feel his heart breaking._

_"… but I still want to be friends Harry. You mean so much to me that I would hate for you not to be a part of my life." Draco said quietly. The cliché cut into Harry like a knife and panic suddenly coursed through him. This was actually happening, it was really over. The sudden urge to lay on the ground and cry his eyes out swept over him, but his instincts told him not to let Draco see him like that. His instincts told him to run, so he did. He stood quickly knocking over the chair and startling Draco. He walked quickly out of the kitchen and grabbed his bag and keys from the entry way and then he ran._

_He wasn't sure if Draco called after him, all he heard was the wind in his ears and small fragments of their conversation._

_Harry ran and ran; down alley ways and side streets. He ran past people talking walks in the setting sun and women pushing baby carriages. He ran until he got to the tube and then he broke down. He cried until he got to Notting Hill. Feeling utterly pathetic with every look of pity he received. Once he got out of the tube he started to run again. He barely made it to Ron and Hermione's before he collapsed. They had welcomed him in with open arms; Hermione providing him with a shoulder to cry on and a warm cup of tea and Ron threatening 'to go over there and kill the stupid prick.' In the end he had stayed with them for a week before collecting his things from his and Draco's flat and then moving to Lille, France._

_Over time Draco had slowly exited his thoughts and his heart had become less fragile. Away from everyone Harry more time for his paintings and more inspiration. However after a little more then a year in France he had moved back to England and into the little white house with Seamus. Even after three years it still felt like he was running. And Draco had finally caught up._

_/END FLASHBACK/_

Harry felt weak and exhausted. He felt like he had broken up with Draco all over again. He wanted nothing more then to curl up with a pint of ice cream, watch a sappy romantic film where everyone ends up happy in the end and forget all about Draco Malfoy.

He carefully heaved himself out of the bath and the water that was now only lukewarm. The cold air chilled his body as he brought the fluffy towel to his damp skin. He gave himself another once over in the mirror, he looked a mess.

He quickly brushed his teeth and washed his face before quietly stepping out of the bathroom. The lights were almost all off and he could here Seamus' loud laugh from the living room. Their date had begun; it was too late for ice cream. He tip-toed back to his room and dimmed the light. He switched on the TV, immediately turning down the volume. He dropped the towel to the floor in a heap and quickly climbed into bed. He loved the feel of the warm blankets against his cold naked skin. He felt warm and drowsy under his mountain of blankets. The world felt safe at this distance.

"Good night Alexander."


	3. Return to Notting Hill

**Disclaimer**: Again I don't own Harry Potter... 

**Summary**: AU: No magic. Draco and Harry split up and Harry ran. Now he is back and living in a small Longon neighborhood, with Seamus and selling his paintings at a local cafe. HPDM SLASH. With mentions of HGRW.

**A/N: **Hello! It has been ages! I sincerely apologize! It is snowing outside my appartment right now so I decided to take a lazy day. What better than to write to HD slash? I'm not sure. Anyways enjoy! It's sort of short. Sorry.

* * *

Sunlight filtered in through a wood paned window and on to delicate eyelids. Which scrunch in annoyance before opening slowly and shutting again with the glare of the sun. Shit. Last night he had forgotten to close curtains. Harry opened his eyes again; this time prepared, and carefully untangled himself from his covers and stretched in a surprising catlike manner. His body felt tight again and he felt drained. He groaned once and rolled over to face away from his wall. The first thing he noticed was that his door was a jar. Alexander must have left in the middle of the night.

"Everything I love leaves me!" He muttered in mock melodrama.

Harry sat up and stretched again, careful to keep the sheet rapped around his thin waist. The blinking clock on his desk read ten to nine. He must have slept later than he though. He gingerly put his feet on the hard wood floors, swaying slightly with the sudden rush and feeling dizzy. He leisurely reached his arms up above his head, elongating his torso and moaned quietly. He stretched down to the floor and touched his toes, feeling the stiffness in his hamstrings. He straightened out again and walked to his dresser and opened the first drawer. He fished out a pair of grey boxers and slid them on quickly. He shifted through some clothing on the floor until he found a pair of black sweats. He grabbed a white T-shirt advertising Lille as the European City of Culture for 2004 in big letters and pulled over his head.

Fully dressed he walked to the door without looking in the mirror and pushed his door open wider and left his room. He walked cautiously down the hall, hoping Fredrick was gone. He really wasn't in the mood for lovey doveyness.

"Good morning sleepy head." Came an exuberant Irish voice, causing Harry to jump.

"Ugh. Good morning" Harry said getting a cup from the dish rack and setting on he counter. "Is there any coffee"

"Oh. Yeah it's over by the toaster.. don't know why though.." Seamus trailed off looking vaguely bemused.

"Thanks." Said Harry walking over to get and then fill up his cup. He picked it up and held the now warm cup in his hands, savoring the feeling of warmth in his finger. He gently leaned back against the count and brought the cup to his mouth and took a tentative sip. "Where's Fredrik?"

Seamus hadn't seemed to have heard him as he was staring carefully at a pan in front of him. Harry walked over to stand behind him and admire his cooking. The eggs looked runny but Harry smiled anyway.

"Had a meeting.. left about.. about an hour ago." Seamus said slowly before prodding an egg carefully. "These will be done in a few."

"Now you make breakfast? Man you're such a little housewife! When are you going to start cleaning?" Harry asked chuckling lightly into his cup at the look of mock outrage on his friend's face.

"Yes well, you're welcome mate. Just thought you could a cherry breakfast. You looked a bit put out last night. Something happen?" Seamus questioned taking his eyes away from the eggs to glance at Harry for a few moments.

"Hey watch those!" Harry said pointing at his eggs that were starting to stick to the pan. He loved his roommate dearly, but the man could not cook. He pitied Fredrik in that regard, the fish must have been awful.

"Opps!" Seamus said quickly and begging to scoop them up with his spatula and deposit them on a vibrant plate. He artfully sprinkled salt on them and handed the plate to Harry. "Voila!" He said proudly, waiting for Harry to take a bite.

Harry stared at them guilty appreciation. He knew Seamus wanted his reaction but the eggs just did not look appetizing. He smiled brightly and shoved a big bite in his mouth and quickly had to hold back his gag reflex. The eggs were crusty on one side from being scrapped off the on and slimy on the other. He swallowed forcefully and smiled at Seamus.

"Mmmm. Their really good. You're getting a lot better!" Harry said with false enthusiasm. Seamus didn't seem to notice and positively beamed. He put the pan in the sink carefully and then slid into the chair across from Harry.

"So. Once again, what the hell happened last night? Don't even think you're leaving this table until you tell me." Seamus said in a very mothering tone.

Harry groaned slightly and leaned back in his chair. "Fine! Fine I'll tell you. When I was at the café yesterday I had a run in with somebody and it just sort of zapped my energy. I am feeling sick though. I wasn't lying to you mate." Harry finished with a smile.  
"You saw Draco didn't you." Seamus said with sad eyes and a soft voice.

"Yes." Harry said avoiding his eyes and staring at his eggs. "Wait. How did you know?"

"Harry, I'm really sorry. You have to believe me." Seamus said his voice still low but filled with sincerity that puzzled Harry. "Draco came here a few days ago looking for you. I told him you weren't here and that he needed to stay away from you.. but he sat me down and begged me to tell you where he could find you. He looked so upset Harry! I just couldn't refuse him.. so I told him that you frequent the Blue Moon.. he promised he wouldn't upset you! I'm so sorry!" Harry sat silently for what seemed and eternity to Seamus before finally whispering, "You told him where to find me?"

"Yes! I'm really sorry Harry! He just seemed so desperate!" Seamus replied looking extremely guilty and earnest.

"Seamus how could you? You know how I feel about him! You know how much I've done to assure that I would never have to look at him again!" Harry yelled in voice still soft but loaded with emotion. "I have to go."

Harry got up quickly from the table and ran back to his room. He locked the door and was thankful that Seamus didn't try and follow him. He ripped off his clothes and quickly pulled on paint splattered jeans and tight white t-shirt. He grabbed a jacket and his bag and started towards the door. He stopped quickly and went to his dresser and grabbed a pack of cigarettes and then left to room. He walked hurriedly down the hall and took the stair and small leaps. He grabbed his keys and wretched the door open and then slammed it again.

Seamus still sat at the table looking at Harry's barely touched eggs. He sighed quietly and vaguely wondered if Harry would return before he went to sleep that night.  
---  
Harry ran down their front walk and jammed his keys into his little beat up car. It was a small tan little thing with too much stuff in it. Empty cigarette cartridges and receipts littered the floor and multiple paint splotches marked his seat. In the back was a white comforter and he tossed his bag on top of it. In the trunk were a few pillows, a straw beach mat, a few pairs of jeans, multiple jumpers, and some cleaning utensils. Harry liked to brag he could live out of his car.

He started the engine a little violently and felt bad, it wasn't his cars fault. He immediately lit a cigarette and turned the music up really loud. Loud dance techno music flooded his car and pulled out of his parking spot. He didn't have the faintest idea of where he was going to go but that didn't matter. He knew that he just needed to get out and for some reason he knew driving around would help.

Before he knew it he had reached Notting Hill and this felt all too familiar to him. Did he always have to run to Ron and Hermione when he felt depressed? He didn't want to stop and analyze this right now and killed the engine. He extinguished his sixth cigarette and grabbed his bag from the back and got out of the car. He walked slowly up their front walk to give him time to steady himself. He knocked on their door rather than rang the bell because it was only 11am, but he knew they would be awake.

A few seconds after he knocked he could hear movement from within their house and waited patiently. He could hear his goddaughter Maggie running towards the door and the loud footsteps of Ron trying to follow her. A second later the door opened quickly exposing a tired looking Ron with the devious Maggie in his arms. The second she saw him she went insane trying to get to Harry. Ron quickly deposited her into Harry's open arms and welcomed him in.

Harry held her with one arm and used the other to shut the door. The house looked exactly as it always did, children toys scattered everywhere but everything else was neat. It held a very welcoming and warm atmosphere and it was Harry's favorite escape. He could hear Hermione fussing around in the kitchen and walked still carrying Maggie to greet her. She stood in front of a small high chair trying to feed a very stubborn 13 month old Henry.

"Good morning Hermione!" Harry said brightly come to hug her with his free arm. "And good morning to you too little Henry."

Henry stared at him for a few seconds before his chubby little lips opened into a toothy smile. His mother took this opportunity to sneak in a spoonful of food and he turned his shocked little face back to her and glared. Harry chuckled at the indignant look on his face and patted Hermione on the back.

"Okay fine!" She said with her hands on her hips but a smile on her face. "I give up mister." She put the bowl and spoon on the counter and carefully lifter Henry out his chair. Free of his prison he beamed with pleasure and shuffled his fat little legs in midair. Hermione placed him lightly on the space between her hip and growing belly, and then turned to face Harry. "So how are you Harry?"

"Oh you know, getting by." Harry said offhandedly. Now that he was here his confrontation with Draco didn't seem that bad and it seemed silly to complain about it. Just as he was about to ask Hermione the same question Maggie pulled gently at his hair in an attempt to recapture his attention.

"Maggie! What have I told you about pulling hair?" Hermione scolded with an air of exasperation. "I'm sorry Harry." Maggie on the contrary seemed unfazed and smiled back impishly at her mother. She then squirmed slightly, a sign she wanted to be put down. Harry obliged and she promptly toddled off to go find her father or some form of mischief.

"It's okay Herms. But Jesus! You're getting huge!" Harry said finally able to take her in.

"Oh well thanks Harry. I already felt like a whale, but that made me feel loads better." She said this with a tone full of sarcasm but a small smile played about her full lips. "Oh no! Did you make a comment about her weight?" Asked Ron now coming to join them in the kitchen followed by a very mischievous looking Maggie. "That is almost a death sentence during the seventh month. Bad form mate."

Harry laughed at this and then decided to look apologetic. Hermione found the look on his face hilarious and laughed loudly. This proved to be a mistake as it startled Henry and ended his good mood. He glared at his mother again and struggled to get away from her. "Here Ron, can you take him?"

Ron reached out his arms and took the flailing toddler. The instant he was in his father's arms he settled down immediately and smiled contentedly. "Goodness! I swear that boy is bipolar! He has more mood swings than my mum did during menopause!" Hermione said laughing softly at her own joke.

Harry smiled at the entire scene, the beautiful and pregnant Hermione, his impish goddaughter and temperamental godson and his best friend. He was suddenly filled with a complete sense of calm and the odd assurance that life was going to work out.

---  
Harry walked slowly back to his car and turned to the key. It was past midnight and he was slightly tired. Hermione had put the kids to bed at 8:30 and they had spent rest of the night drinking wine and discussing life. All the problems that had seemed to plague him earlier were gone. He drove silently back to his apartment and didn't light one cigarette. When he got home the entire place was dark, Seamus was asleep. He walked silently to his room and collapsed on the bed. He was asleep before he even hit the pillows. He didn't change his clothes.


End file.
